Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Back to School Part 2: Tall-Fountain Hogs

Most drinking fountains come in pairs. One tall, one short. The short one is awkward to use, especially while wearing a heavy backpack. There is nothing worse than having your backpack avalanche forward onto your head when you are crouched down, trying to get a few sips of water out of a too-low drinking fountain. It almost always results in cranial injury or water up your nose.

BYU has many, many drinking fountains. BYU also has many, many socially unaware individuals who feel it is necessary to fill up their water bottle at the tall drinking fountain.

Why. Why do they do this? Water bottles take for-ev-er to fill up, and most people don't have time in between classes to wait for the water bottle hog to finish replenishing their stupid nalgene before the bell rings.

Ergo, the short drinking fountain is all that is left to quench the thirst of the short, average, and giant-sized students waiting in line. It really irks me when I see dumb-dumbs on their bedazzled cell phones blissfully filling their water bottles while the football player next to them is trying, in vain, to drink out of a water fountain positioned knee-high.

Tall drinking fountain water bottle hogs MUST GO. Use. The. Short. One.


  1. Because the low one is for someone on the wheelchair.

  2. When someone is hogging the tall fountain, I get down on both knees and drink from the short one. I'm tall enough to do that. It's quite passive-aggressive, which I love, and it gets the message across quite nicely.


What must go, must go.