Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Puka Shells (and Kenny Chesney)

Puka shells. Huka shells. Mispronounced, misused and abused all over the united states since the late 90's.

(Note: if you live in Hawaii you are kind of excused. But you should still watch yourself.)
It's rare that people sport these crusty crustacean strands in the contiguous united states, but when they do, it's one of the most ignominious fashion faux pas an offender can ever commit. There once was a time when these necklaces were super in... and that time ended about a decade ago.

Pukas are most often sported by men who think of themselves as ultra-hot macho men. This puzzles me. There really should be a public service anouncement addressing the fact that pukas are a sign of douchebaggery and weakness, and that wearing them does not magically transform you from a tool into a winner.

Your necklace belongs in a garbage can, circa 2001.

Puka shells must go.

P.S. Kenny Chesney can go too.


  1. i kind of think you should start including the "how" behind how you came to these realizations on what "should go." a little background info would be appreciated. maybe with a cell phone picture once in a while? pretty please? you make me laugh. love you.

  2. Ha ha ha ha. Its. So. TRUE.

    also, where on earth did you find that amazing photo of the sheep falling off the cliff?

  3. Agreed.

    I have recently discovered another phenomena that must go...bobble heads in the back window of a Pontiac. That is all.


What must go, must go.